By teatime I'd discovered the joys of racking up impressive or excruciating kills. Then I went on a drive-by spree to stir things up with a rival gang, whose taste for green clothing offends my sense of fashion. By mid-morning, I was spraying an entire neighbourhood with human excrement from a hijacked sewage truck in the hope of dropping the property values (and I drowned some cops in liquid faeces for good measure). I started the day with a daring one-man raid on a courtroom, which ended when I shot a Judge Judy-style harpy in the face with a shotgun. Mind you, in the last couple of hours I've been doing my utmost to piss everyone off.
